Entitled Teens or Entitling Teens?

Are teens children?

Recently, my home town newspaper featured an article entitled, “[Town] Youth Seek Change: More events, more support, more belonging,” which covered a meeting of the “Youth Leadership Council” in which local teens whined about the lack of entertainment available to them, especially past 10:00 PM when the town becomes a “ghost town.” Teens, in essence, said that they get into trouble because adults have not provided areas and activities for their amusement. They demand donations for art supplies, music, movie equipment, food, and funds for their events. They have a few ideas for fund-raising (including free-will donations), but claim that they need adults to “show up, listen, volunteer, and help spread the word” and “to mak[e] these projects happen.”

These outcries of teens are nothing new. I recall the same complaints from teens in this town 20 or 30 years ago. The problem is not a lack of opportunities for entertainment after 10 PM, even though the town does “roll up the sidewalks” at night. The problem is not that the community must cater to teens to keep them out of trouble. The problem is not that local businesses and adult leaders do not donate their time, talents, and treasure to teen recreation. Indeed, this town is, and has been, generous and has, for its small size, offered many recreational activities for young people from sports to theater, even in the summertime. The problem is with the teens themselves, their parents, and a political system that promotes perpetual childhood.

The problems of politics. By a problematic political system, I mean both laws and cultural expectations affecting teens. Previous generations, in an effort to stem the horrors of child labor, perhaps went too far in limiting the opportunities of young people to work. Grimy children of eight, nine, or ten slaving away for fourteen hours a day in coal mines or textile factories in dangerous and unhealthy conditions is indeed horrific. But a thirteen year old delivering papers on his bicycle early in the morning or bagging groceries for eight hours a day in the summer is healthy. It teaches responsibility, work ethic, keeps him busy and productive, and promotes positive interactions with adults. Children and teens whose parents are farmers or entrepreneurs still have the opportunity to work hard in the family business - and many do! But this opportunity is denied or severely limited for most young people aged twelve to fifteen. In many cultures of the past and in some cultures around the world even in the present, coming of age ceremonies and rites occur in the teen years, some as early as twelve or thirteen years old, many by the age of sixteen. In these cultures, even though the young person remains under the roof and authority of their parents after “coming of age,” there are different expectations of behavior and responsibility for these young men and young women. It irks me to hear sixteen and seventeen year olds referred to as children. They may still be minors. They almost certainly need parental guidance and authority. But they are not children. In recent years in the United States, we have prolonged childhood and delayed adult responsibilities into the mid twenties. “Kidults” are a new, but entirely too common phenomenon. Our culture needs to take another look at child labor laws. We can find a healthy balance that protects children from exploitation while promoting safe, healthy work environments for young people.

The problem of parenting. Why, pray, are teens on the streets past 10:00 PM? I’m not aware of a town curfew on young people, but why don’t the parents have a curfew for their children? At 10:00 PM a teen should be at home, and probably in bed! I know the popular idea that teens are naturally night owls - and some research purportedly backs that up. But I was a teen once, too. If you get up early enough, and work hard enough, you are pretty tired when the sun sets. My grandfather was a teen in the 1930s. Farm kids like him got up early and went to bed early. They worked before and after school during the school year and from dawn to dusk in the summer. Town kids (in this same town where I live now) got into trouble - probably by staying out late with their peers! My grandfather could have gotten into trouble, too, but my great grandfather saw the problems and made arrangements to avert them. Great Grandpa, instead of having his son board in town to go to high school, bought an automobile so Grandpa could drive to and from school each day. Great Grandpa was not rich, the car was not new, fancy, or particularly reliable, and the ten or twelve miles of dirt road were difficult terrain to navigate in inclement weather. The trip in winter sometimes required snow removal from the road - with a shovel! My great grandfather knew the risks of leaving his son to his own devices in town. He acted like a parent and sacrificed to provide the means to prevent his son from straying - and to teach him character. Where are the parents of these teens today?

The problem of the pubescent. Teens get a lot of excuses made for them. Perhaps that is why they make so many excuses for themselves. Our nation’s first Admiral, David Farragut, was, when he was twelve (some sources say eleven), put in charge of the entire crew of a sailing vessel in the Atlantic Ocean and ordered to sail it to port. John Quincy Adams, sixth president of the United States, was, at the age of fourteen, sent as assistant to the Ambassador of the United States to the court of Catherine the Great of Russia. He was chosen because he was fluent in French, the court language of Europe, and the Ambassador was not. There, far from both parents, he conducted the business of the United States. Teens suffer from lack of motivation, lack of high expectations, and lack of example. But that does not excuse them. There have been teens who, even in the face of adverse political environments and complete lack of parental care and guidance, have set themselves toward a worthy goal and worked hard to reach it. Teens today, in my town, can do the same. They could earn their own funds for the supplies they are begging from the community. They could rake leaves, shovel snow, wash windows, babysit, walk dogs, and mow lawns, to name a few entrepreneurial ventures suitable to young people with few skills. They could learn and practice skills that will grow their future earning potential. They could volunteer to deliver meals on wheels to home-bound senior citizens (they admit they have access to cars) or to help at the local nursing home. In doing all these things, they would find the connection to the community they say they are seeking. They would be able to do more than stare at their phones or hang out in parking lots vaping. They would be developing healthy habits for adulthood. They would be giving back to the community that has already given them so much! Teens feel entitled to be served. They feel entitled to be entertained. They feel entitled to donations towards their pleasure. Perhaps we need to stop making excuses for them and entitle them to serve others, work hard, and donate their own time and abundant energy to their community. In the short term and the long haul, it will make them happier.